Picking classes for the fall at UNT puts you face-to-face with an overwhelming mountain of completely lame bullshit. History? Snore. Science? Liberal propaganda. Capstone? What the fuck is that, anyway?
Thankfully, it’s not too late to switch out of these lame “mandatory” classes and do what you really came to college for: expanding your horizons! Next time you’re dreading taking your fourth Spanish class or whatever, swap in these gems instead.
PHED 2069: Intermediate Babymaking
From fornication to fertilization, learn how to put a little miracle inside that girl with the lazy eye from anthropology. Just make sure you have the proper baby-making music ready at all times.
COMM 1010: Introduction to Introductions
This intro-level class will introduce students to introducing themselves. If you like this course, consider taking its follow-up classes: Intermediate Intermediaries 101010 and Advanced Advancement 10101010.
LSCM 1169: Collaborative Cartel Infrastructure
Is your drug trafficking outfit ripping at the seams? Run a tight crystal ship with this foolproof course in discipline, reinforcement and waterboarding, for all the skills you need to push your crystal blue persuasion.
Prerequisite(s): CHEM 1400 or equivalent.
CJUS 800D: Advanced Dickpunching
Refine your groin clobbering technique with Professor “Nasty Neal” Smatresk’s patented dickpunching program. Protective equipment and medicated ointment required.
THEA 455: Assclowning Practicum
Clown asses? Asses that look like clowns? There’s only one way to find out.
HNRS 4173: Honors Classical Arson
Study fire-setting techniques from the pyromaniacs of antiquity while collaborating on a group project to burn down your choice of campus building.
The Electric Eagle 